Resilience in Motherhood: Building Strength Beyond Mom Guilt

Every mom can relate to the weight of mom guilt, feeling like they’re constantly falling short. In this episode, host Siobhan Bingham welcomes Brigid Tebaldi for a conversation about resilience in motherhood and building strength beyond mom guilt.

From the importance of cultivating emotional resilience to the power of redefining what “good enough” looks like, listeners will gain valuable insights into overcoming self-doubt and embracing their own strengths as moms. Brigid shares surprising insights on how to turn the challenges of motherhood into opportunities for growth, helping you create a more empowered, balanced life.

Tune in for practical strategies on building resilience and letting go of guilt to become the mom you want to be, with confidence and grace.

Brigid Tebaldi is a holistic women’s health coach helping moms heal their minds & bodies after babies by blending old wisdom w/modern living, so they can trust their instincts & live happy, healthy lives.

In this episode you’ll learn:

• How to reframe the way you view mom guilt and its impact on your mental well-being.
• The role of emotional resilience in overcoming guilt and staying grounded as a mom.
• Practical strategies for building strength and coping with challenges without sacrificing your sense of self.
  
  

Noteworthy quotes from this episode:

 “The biggest thing is to just listen to whatever it is your instincts are telling you to do. You don't have to do what everybody is telling you to do, whether that be about the pregnancy, or about the birth, or about the postpartum, or how to mother, do what feels good for you, not what the world is telling you to do.” -BT

“ …shining that light and making sure that everyone knows that you're never really alone in motherhood. We all go through the same experiences, even if we're not necessarily talking about it all the time.” -SB

“... if your nervous system is out of whack, then everything is because think about it, your nervous system controls every single part of your body…your brain tells your nerves what to do, not just voluntarily, but all of those involuntary organs and processes that have to happen.” -BT

“ we've got to show them how to be good humans by being good humans ourselves and acknowledging that no one is perfect and everyone's different and we've got to figure things out how we can.” -SB

Connect with Brigid Tebaldi

Instagram: @brigid.tebaldi

Website: loretowellness.com

Email: brigid@loretowellness.com

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Connect with Siobhan

• Tired of being tired? Go from “Too Tired” to “Ready for Anything” with Siobhan’s 21 Energy Hacks
• Ready to reclaim your energy and wellness, Mama? DM Siobhan on Instagram for details about her coaching services.
• Instagram: @everwellcoaching

About Siobhan Bingham

Siobhan Bingham coaches working moms to boost their energy to show up better for their kids, their partner, their work, and themselves. Using her ALIGN framework, she provides personalized strategies to break free from exhaustion and create a daily rhythm that works with your life—not against it.

Transcript

 Hey mama, welcome to the Everwell Mama podcast, the place where we explore simple, sustainable self care and wellness strategies to help you feel your best while managing your busy life. I'm Siobhan Bingham, a holistic life and wellness coach here to guide you as we uncover practical tools that will actually stick, so you can enjoy self care without the guilt trip.

Whether you're a new listener or returning for more, I'm so glad you're here. Let's dive into the next step on your journey to becoming an Everwell Mama.

All right. Hello. How are you today? 

I'm doing so well. How are you? 

I'm great. Thank you. So, I would love to know a little bit more about who you are and what you do. 

Yeah, so I'm Brigid, and I am, let's see, first off, I'm a wife and a mom of five little ones, , eight, six, four, two, and almost nine months.

Hopefully none of them will be making an appearance in the next few minutes as we talk, but we will see. And, , I live in  western Pennsylvania. And so right now we have quite a bit of, well, we did have quite a bit of snow. A lot of it melted yesterday, but now it's freezing cause it's so cold out.

Um, yeah, yeah. So I live in Western Pennsylvania. We live on a farm and I own Loretto Wellness, which is where I help moms who've had difficult births, heal their minds and bodies after. Amazing. And how 

did, how did you get into that work? 

Kind of, , from my own story. So I had, uh, somewhat of a rough birth for my first baby.

And then for my second, I had a precipitous labor and I also had a hemorrhage after the fact. And it was just, I didn't feel like I had any support. It felt like I was pretty much all on my own. And I wasn't, but that's how it felt , and just like really alone and lost. And if I asked for help, then it meant I was a bad mom and like all those different feelings that you have whenever you're first postpartum.

And then you have something happen that you're not like sure what's happening. So there was all of that. And then,. Yeah, it took me a while to heal after that experience, and I just really want to help moms not ever feel like that, like to not ever feel like they're all alone or that what they did was their fault or that their bodies are broken or anything like that, like to help them really see that what happened to them again, wasn't their fault, that they're a really good mom and just to really help them like see where Jesus was in their story as well.

It's super important to me. 

Yeah, that's really beautiful and very needed. There's so often that we do get in this trap of feeling guilty about whether it's our birth story or it's another part of mothering and parenting, right? , there's so much guilt that comes with it in our society these days, so it's really nice that you're helping support moms through.

Those tricky times. So I want to kind of go into our next section, which is what I call the reality check. So I want to kind of normalize those parts of motherhood that we all experience, but we don't always talk about or share about. And so that kind of adds to that guilty feeling. So Going back to when you first became a mom, or even in that second postpartum period for you, what is one thing that you wish that you would be able to tell your past self?

Oh man, that's a good question. I don't know how to narrow it down to one thing. Well, you can, you can have more than one, absolutely. So I'm obviously in a very different place now than I was then. And I know that even in a year, I'll be in a different place then than I am now. So actually, I know what I would say.

The biggest thing is to just listen to whatever it is. Your instincts are telling you to do that. You don't have to do what everybody is telling you to do, whether that be about the pregnancy or about the birth or about like the postpartum or how to mother do what feels good for you, not what the world is telling you to do.

Yeah, that's beautiful. I could give you, like, a standing ovation right now for that. That's so, that's so powerful, right? Because there is, , all of this, , onslaught of information thrown at moms all the time and all of this extra, , burden of what society is going to think and, , all of the things that you should be doing, which, again, is adding into that guilt, right?

So being able to just trust yourself and know that. You're doing your best and your best is more than good enough is a really really special thing. So I love that is there something that you think in this season or past seasons of motherhood, do you think that there's one thing that you feel nervous about or you feel like you're the only one in motherhood to feel this way?

That's a hard one too. I'm going to say it's probably what everybody says, so I know it's like kind of a weird answer to your question. The idea that  I'm doing something wrong. 

Mm hmm. 

But I know that a lot of other moms feel that way, but it's hard to remember that whenever you're like in the trenches of it and you feel like you're doing everything wrong.

Absolutely. , so I think that is probably the biggest one is that it feels like, I'm doing things wrong or like I'm going to screw something up and I am like, I know that I'm going to, cause I'm not, I'm not a perfect person. Yeah. That's just where I have to really remind myself that that's where grace comes in.

And that's where I need to allow myself to recognize that I'm not a perfect person as much as I sometimes would like to think that I am. Yeah. My children are also not perfect people and that my husband is not a perfect person and we're all going to make these mistakes, but we just have to recognize that, I would say at least most of the time, we are doing the best that we can, given the situations that we're in.

So I think that's the biggest thing. And again, I know it's, that's not like just for me to feel that way. I know so many moms feel that way, but again, it just feels like I'm all alone in that sometimes, but even though I'm not. 

Yeah, no, that's why I asked that question because. Pretty much anything that anyone says, there's going to be another mom who's also felt that way, right?

So it's just kind of shining that light and making sure that everyone knows that you're never really alone in motherhood. We all go through the same experiences, even if we're not necessarily talking about it all the time. Yeah. Yeah, 

definitely. 

Alright, so let's dive into our main bit of the day, which is all about resilience in motherhood.

So tell me a little bit about how you have kind of found yourself into this work of resilience. 

So I came across, well obviously I've known what resilience is like since I don't even know when, but I never really like stuck with me. It's like, oh yeah, that's just what it is. But whenever I was doing my traditional birth companion training, since you're in Canada, , the traditional birth companion is just an alternative outside of the medical system.

Okay. , so that's where I did my training. So even though I'm in the states, I just really, really loved the program that was in Canada. So I went with that. And so traditional birth companion and one of her big things was that we had to take in addition to the traditional birth companion course. So it's essentially like a lay midwifery course.

In addition to that course, we had to take her, trauma informed professional training. And essentially what that training did is it really taught us what, , certain things within a system look like, how we can, , prevent those things, how we can try to mitigate some of those things, and how we aren't going to be able to fix a lot of those things, unfortunately.

So one of the biggest things that she really tried to hit home is this idea of resilience. Because if you have a really strong, Resilient brain, then even if things go poorly, or , they don't go the way that you think that they're going to go, your brain is going to be able to be like, okay, that didn't go how I wanted it to go.

But I know that something better is coming, or I know that I can, I can be okay, even if it didn't go the way that I wanted it to. So. To dive in first, this idea of means the capacity to recover quickly from any sort of difficulties or, basically  to be able to bounce back or to be elastic and that's again one of the biggest things, especially as moms, that's really important for us because if our brains Encounter a situation.

So if we encounter a situation that might feel impossible, if we have a really high threshold of resiliency, our brain is going to be like. Okay, this is a challenge. I don't know what to do yet, but it's okay, I'll figure it out. Versus if we don't necessarily have that,  high threshold of resiliency because of any sort of upbringing that we had, like any sort of internal programming that we were given basically from just living with people, or any traumas or anything like that, then we will be less resilient, and then therefore more likely to spiral into this , woe is me, my life is terrible, that sort of thing.

And a big component of that resiliency is obviously that your brain needs to be healthy. So in order for your brain to be healthy, your body has to be healthy, and by, by body being healthy, I mean nutrition is super, super important because your brain is made up of about 60 percent fats. So if you're not eating well, your brain's not going to be nourished well.

And then especially if you've had any sort of really significant trauma that caused any sort of PTSD, then PTSD is literally a brain injury. So if you're not eating well and nourishing your body well, your body's not going to have what it needs in order to heal that brain injury. So often we think about just healing external wounds or broken bones or whatever, but a lot of times we don't think about our brains, but they are still something that needs healed and still need something that needs repaired pretty constantly.

So again, it's this whole idea of just being able to bounce back and to withstand Whatever it is that we're facing, but it really comes down to this idea of in order to do that. We need to be healthy, mentally, physically and, , emotionally as well. 

That's really beautiful and a very clear definition for anyone who wasn't sure what resilience is..

 And definitely as a mother who has gone through some. trickier births myself as well. I can definitely see how resiliency comes into play in your work. And I'm really glad that you were able to do that trauma informed, training as well, because that is something that is so necessary and needed, especially when you're dealing with.

Moms or anyone who is going through any sort of tricky situations and potential trauma, right?  So what do you think about situations in, , everyday life as moms that could potentially be, , a trigger for any sort of past,  traumas or wiring that we have. For example, let's say I hear a bunch of whining.

Throughout the day, right? That's something I think that's pretty common as a trigger for a lot of people. So how could we improve our resiliency for something like 

that? Yeah, so probably the biggest thing with that, and this is so hard for moms especially, or parents in general, is that if you are really triggered by loud noises or just like feeling over touched or over stimulated or any of those sorts of words, then what it comes down to is that your nervous system is probably fried and that you really need to take time to, I'm not gonna get into like the scientific parts of it, but you have to Different parts of your nervous system.

Mm hmm. And  if the one type of your nervous system is like totally on overdrive, totally overwhelmed all the time, then basically that's going to mean that the littlest thing will make you snap. Or, it can go the opposite direction. Well, kind of opposite direction where you hyper focus on a certain thing, because that's what you feel like you can control and you kind of shut the world out of everything else.

So, for example, I have a client who,   she has a history of disordered eating.  She already knew she had that and like, she kind of worked through it a little bit, but we uncovered that the reason that she was really , Hyper focusing on this eating is the same reason that she is now hyper focusing on these obsessive thoughts that she has about Like her son dying or if something happens to her or  did she say the wrong thing in this situation?

So just these hyper focusing or  these obsessive thoughts and it really comes down to just She never has allowed herself to just rest and be calm And be still and it allowing her brain to figure out  that she is safe She's always looking for this next thing that she can control in order to help her feel safe So it's really just this idea of  you need to regulate your nervous system and I know that's  kind of like a buzzword In the health world nowadays, but it really is true because if your nervous system is out of whack, then  everything is because think about it, your nervous system controls every single part of your body,  your brain tells your nervous system, , well, it's connected, but , your brain tells your nerves what to do, not just voluntarily, but all of those involuntary organs and, , processes that have to happen.

If your nervous system is not firing properly, or if it's firing too much, or. Okay. Your HPA axis is all messed up and your Polyvagus nerve is  not functioning properly,  all those different things aren't working, then you're going to constantly feel overstimulated. You're going to constantly feel triggered and you're probably also going to have some physical symptoms showing up as well.

And that's one thing too, to really keep in mind is that we are a whole body person that we need to have this approach about where , we don't just need to heal our mind or like get rid of the trigger. We don't just need to fix. I don't know, the eczema or The stomach issues or anything like that, , we have to look at the whole person and the whole situation that we're in, in order to really heal from that, , very basic level.

And then we can start to see those trickle effects, which means, , no more yelling at the kids, , being okay, if they're screaming, or how, even if you're not okay with their screaming, , having a plan to make it so that you can be okay with it. So, kind of just, , understanding all of those different things is really helpful.

Yeah, absolutely. , And I really like how you were talking about her sense of safety, because that's like, I forget  who did it, but that like hierarchy of needs, right? You need to feel safe before you can do anything else. So if you're triggered down at that level, you're going to stay down at that level.

You can't move past it, right? So being able to calm yourself down and find those moments of rest and peace is really important. 

Yeah. And with that too, what. We found with her and  other people that I've worked with and just in general too, is that a lot of times these triggers that we have,  in our adult life are somewhat rooted in our past experiences, not exclusively, but a lot of times.

They are. So for example, this one client, I'll just stick with her. She had this history of eating disorder. She overcame that, and now she  had these more obsessive thoughts. So we actually traced it back to whenever she was an eight year old child, and she said that she never really felt, like, safe in her house, because her dad was always, , kind of on edge, and, , never knew what mood he was going to be in, or what he was going to say to her.

And, , she realized that what she's feeling now, and what she's trying to fix, Like now, it seems like a now problem is actually a problem that's from 30 years ago. That she needs to address in order to heal what's happening now. 

Yeah, so often it's from the past and especially in childhood when we're so malleable and we're taking in so much information, right?

And that's why I'm so passionate about helping moms as well, right? So that we can kind of break those cycles and really be the best model that we can be for our kids. Yeah, for sure. When I was growing up, I didn't have a mom who had a good support system and was able to, like, handle all of the things, right?

Her, her resiliency was pretty high, all things considered, but at the same time, , she was struggling and you could tell, especially as her kids, like, we could tell that she was struggling, right? Yeah. And so I didn't have that modeled for me, , how to properly  take care of mom and do all of those things.

So that's something that I'm really trying to model for my own daughters so that they don't grow up and feel like they have to like mad dash, clean the house because someone's coming over or  have all the dishes  hidden away. Right. Like all of those little things,  just being able to regulate myself so that they can stay regulated as well.

Yeah. And I think that's a great point too, is that  maybe doing the mad dash around the house, Isn't this necessarily the best thing that happens, but whenever it inevitably does happen that you then have the awareness to be like, what mommy did probably wasn't the best thing to do ever. , I'm sorry.

I did this. I'm sorry. Yeah, because again, we're not perfect. We're all going to do and say things we shouldn't do, but just having that awareness. To after the fact explain like why this probably wasn't a good idea. I mean, it's also really powerful on multiple levels for them to see that too. 

Yeah, no, for sure.

It's just like apologizing to kids, right? Like you've got to,  

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 we've got to show them how to be good humans by being good humans ourselves and acknowledging that no one is perfect and everyone's different and we've got to figure things out how we can. 

Yeah, for sure. 

So you've mentioned a lot about regulating your nervous system.

As a mom with five kids, how do you find time in your day or how do you make space in your day to regulate your own nervous system? 

Well, I will say I didn't start out with five kids. I started out with one. So that is definitely something because if you're right now thinking I have one kid and my brain is like on overdrive.

Don't worry.  I started out with one as well. You do gain, , experience as you go, but I think the biggest thing that I've had to do is to sort of, I don't want to say change my mentality about it, but to maybe have a different understanding of what regulating myself means. So again, whenever I was Childless or whenever I only had one child, it was fairly easy for me to have time for myself.

Looking back, it didn't seem like it was easy, but it actually was easy. I could have it two hours whenever she was taking a nap, and I could do whatever I wanted with it within reason. So I was working,  But now that I have five kids, we always do quiet time every single day. And that's usually whenever I do a lot of client calls and, like, get some work done.

But quiet time is really important for them and for me. And we homeschool too, so that's a thing that We have going, , that we do as well. So we always do quiet time every day for about two hours. They get to listen to a story or an audio book, or they get to like color or just like whatever quiet thing that they want to do.

And usually while the younger two nap. Another thing is that at the end of the night, I always take like 10, 15, 20 minutes to journal. And I don't do any sort of like crazy journaling. I literally use. a notebook that was my husband's from high school. Like, it still has some of his notes in it. And again, we were in high school quite a long time ago at this point.

 But I found it in the basement and I was like, okay, I'm just going to use this because why not? So I always take time to journal at night. And I think that that's been really helpful because I write down each of my kids names. And I always write, , one thing that they did that was really funny or cute, or that I always want to remember.

So just one thing about each of them, and then I do the same thing about my husband, and I write, like, Today was a good day, and this is what happened, or , just to try to process some of that stuff, I think it's been really helpful. The other thing is that, , and this sounds so basic. But I always shower and get ready every day.

And I say it sounds so basic because I work with a lot of postpartum moms and sometimes they're like, I don't know how to shower. Like, I can't figure out when to shower. And,  we always go to, you need to shower because, or , get ready, not like hair and makeup, not  that sort of thing, unless that's your thing.

But getting ready. Like, really tells your brain, , okay, we're going for the day. , I'm ready, I'm set, I can take on the world. And showering, obviously, just makes you feel better. So I think those are some very small things that you can do, so that it's not like you can't, because as a mom of five, it's probably impossible for me to ever get an hour where I can, like, light a candle, read a book, like, just chill.

Yeah. Like, maybe once in a while. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. But I think just kind of altering what we think about what that, , self care looks like is more of, I don't know, just  more chill, more little pockets throughout the day instead of these big chunks of time. Another thing that, , actually one of my other clients did is that she was like, I can't find time to pray.

, I just don't know what's wrong with me. I can't find time to pray. And I was like, but where's one time, one time during the day that you're always in the same position, like always in the same place. It's always quiet. And you're always by yourself. She was like, I'm in the shower. And I was like, okay, then that's your time to pray.

So she literally printed something out, laminated it, and she taped it in her shower. And now every day, that's like her little prayer time for herself for 10 minutes. So I think just doing things like that, , is really helpful. But again, I'm not perfect at it. There's definitely days whenever I have not so nice mommy moments.

But I will say that the good days definitely outweigh the bad. 

Yeah, I know, and I think , that's very realistic, right? No one's perfect. No one's ever going to have, , 100 percent sunshine and rainbow days. That's not realistic. We're human.  But having those small pockets of intentional time I think is the most important, and that's what I help.

My clients to find as well. It's just those  small moments of one on one time with you, right? You always focus on one on one time with the kids, one on one time with the husband, with the dogs, whatever, whatever, but you've got to make sure that you've got that one on one time with you as well. So that's really nice to hear that it'll help as well , with resilience.

Yeah, sure. Yeah. , what moms would you recommend, , building up more of this resilience for? , who do you think it would be perfect for? Oh, I mean, everybody. 

Because everybody in their life has experienced some sort of  traumatic thing happened to them, whether that be something like incredibly terrible, or whether that just be  these little traumas that happen throughout the day and the important thing to note is that.

Like you said, like our life isn't going to be all rainbows and sunshine. We're not really made for that necessarily.  We are made, I don't want to say we're made to struggle, but  we are made to work hard. We're made to work. We're made to like strive for. More and that comes from, like, a genuine, like, good hearted place.

Not me saying, , you need to work hard. You need to work, work, work, work, work. But it's like, we're not made to just sit around and, , smell the flowers every single day all day because nothing would get done. , that's just not realistic. So I think it's important for every mom, every person to really take an inventory of, , what has happened in their lives.

How do they feel now about it? How could they maybe adjust certain things? Cause every single person can always grow, can always develop and can always learn something new.  Even the best of the best in whatever industry are always. Trying to innovate themselves or be better or whatever. So I think all of us can do that.

All of us can learn more about how well our bodies work and how to better support our bodies. All of us can be better about taking intentional time for ourselves to really rest and  rejuvenate. All of us can be better about. Serving others well, like, we can all be better at all of those things and all of those things increase resiliency in a person because it's just that ability to bounce back to withstand to be elastic.

So I think every single person, but especially if you are 1, who has experienced some really, really tough times in your life. You more than anybody else really need to prioritize this rest, nutrition, and just, again, appreciating who you are and where you are right now, because, again, if you've gone through some really, really, really hard times, then you need to be really appreciative for what your body's doing for you right now, like,  you're listening to this.

You can, I don't know, , you can see, , you can do all these things, , and just starting really small can be really powerful because it can help your brain to see, like, oh, things are okay. , I am safe. Everything is okay now. And even if it isn't okay tomorrow, like, I will figure out a way for it to be okay.

So, again, in general, everybody can increase their resiliency, but those who've experienced some really challenging times should definitely be looking at how they can improve their rest, nutrition, and just, , overall ability to withstand. Anything. 

And I like how you said being of service to someone as well could help increase your resilience.

So let's say you've got your, your rest, nutrition, and just like the basics down and you're kind of ready for that next step. What do you think would be  a good way of being of service to someone else in order to kind of get that boost  of resiliency in yourself? I 

mean, I think it can be so small, especially nowadays that we have technology,  it can be as simple as like sending somebody that you don't usually talk to,  a nice text to just say like, thank you for everything you've done for me or something like that.

So doing really tiny things, if doing big things feels too hard, do really tiny things. So for example, , one year during Lent.  I was thinking about what I could do in order to sacrifice or whatever, and I thought, why don't I write a letter to somebody one day for 40 days?

So for 40 days, I picked 40 different people and I wrote them a letter. And it really just helped me to reflect , back on why they are important to me. And then I got so many nice comments back from them to say like, Wow, you really helped me to, like, this was so unexpected and so nice. And by them telling me how it made them feel, it made me feel even better.

Because it was like, I was able to make somebody feel so good by doing something so simple. So, I think just doing little things like that would be awesome. 

Yeah, that's really nice. And again, it's, it's the same with our self care, right? Like, we're not gonna have that hour and a half every day, two hours to light a candle and read a book, but we can do little things in order to help not only ourselves, but others as well.

So that's really nice. Yeah, for sure. And then. What would you say to the mom who says, you know, I've tried all the self care, I've tried to like, help my nutrition, I've tried all these things, but nothing has worked. I'm still like, frayed. I'm still struggling. What, what would be like, the number one trick or strategy that you would suggest for them?

If you've tried all of the things, and you're still struggling with whatever you're struggling with, I would probably say there's something at the root that's holding you back, whether that be one of those seven deadly sins, those are what we usually see pop up. Pride is a big one, and not pride in the sense of like, I'm so awesome and I'm so good, but more of pride in like, I can do everything myself, I don't need any help.

Or, , sloth is very rare in moms. And then , some of those other ones are not super rare, pride is probably the biggest one, and it really comes down to this idea of , if I ask for help, then it means I'm a failure, or it means that I'm not good enough, or any of those sorts of feelings that you have.

So I think really digging to the root of why you're feeling like this, because You don't just have a feeling for no reason. Like you're it's your body's way of trying to tell you something. I always say your intuition is the Holy spirit trying to guide you. So really leaning into it and reflecting back.

And it's like, well, what exactly has happened or , why am I feeling this way? So it kind of, what I mentioned earlier, where we have a lot of just in the world and it's not bad, it's just how it is, but in the world. We have things that are like kind of programmed into us. So, for example, if you grew up in a household that wasn't super affluent.

You might go into adulthood thinking, I really want to start a business and I really want to make a difference and earn a lot of money doing it. But, and then this is where things won't ever happen because you have this like, but, and the but would be like, but if I do that, all these people that I, Grew up with are gonna think that I'm  better than them or too good for them, or whatever it is.

So there's usually always some root that still is  like clinging to you that until you release that, nothing. Well, things might get better, but it's never ever gonna be resolved. And again, as people, we're just, we're always gonna have something to work on. So I think that's the other thing to recognize, is that even if you, like, cut off one root, there's probably other ones that are still there, or that are still gonna keep growing, because again, we're just fallen people.

So I think just, yeah, getting to that, really helping them to see, , what is actually in the way. And then just specific to the work that I do, I have this really cool exercise that I do with them, where, , I help them see where Jesus was in their story. And usually, After doing that, like their whole memory of what happened changes.

So they come in to our 1st session and I always do like a big debrief of what happened during their birth. And then in the second session, we do this exercise of where Jesus was. And after that exercise,  it doesn't like change the memory per se, but it changes how they perceive what happened.

So they can then see  where Jesus was. with them during that entire experience. And by just seeing that, it usually brings this sense of  calm and peace so that then they can start to process what actually happened to them. Whereas before there were these blocks of fear or there were these blocks of unworthiness or any of those that were coming up.

But once you start to see  that Jesus was with you during this time, Then that's when things can start to change. That's beautiful. 

And it's really important to find the support and get support if you need it, because you're not always going to be able to. See those roots or see those tricky times on your own, you're going to need support to change that perception of it.

So, yeah, sure. , and do you have any resources or anything that you could share with the audience that would potentially be of support in their building resilience? Yeah, I actually, a lot of stuff. 

Um, if you go to my website, it's just at, , www. loretowellness. com. And that's just spelled L O R E T O wellness.

I have a few different freebies that are there. One of them is from pain to peace and it really just walks you through like the beginning stages of healing. , I have a few different web, , like masterclasses that I offer as well, and like I'm doing one actually this week coming up. It's about reclaiming your joy.

So it probably won't be out in  time, but I do those pretty much every week where it's just about like how to really, it's never necessarily about resiliency, like entitle, but it's, everything is always about that. Like, so for this one about reclaiming your joy, like reclaiming, not just to feel happy, but to  feel joyful.

And when you feel joyful, again, not all the time, but most of the time, whenever you feel joyful, you're going to really start to see things in a different way, which again, helps your brain to be like, Oh, everything's okay. I feel safe and good. , and then I'm on Instagram at Brigid. Tebaldi as well. 

 I will make sure to link all that stuff down on the show notes that it's easy to find.

But yeah, thank you so much , for chatting with me today about resilience and motherhood. I'm very excited , to see how people kind of take these ideas and start to run with them. And hopefully we've helped some mom out there to know that she's not alone and in her feelings and that , she has the capacity and the ability to push through the tough times.

By changing her perception, by working on her rest, nutrition, and by supporting herself , to be able to look after her family a little better as well. 

Yeah, definitely. Thanks so much for having me. It was . So nice to chat with you again. Yeah. 

All right. Well, we'll see you soon.

Thank you so much for tuning in today. You can find the transcript and all the resources mentioned in the show notes below. If this episode was helpful, I would really appreciate you leaving a 5 star rating and review so I can keep making it. Also, I want to make sure this podcast actually answers your wellness questions.

If you've got a specific question about how to implement more wellness into your already filled day, Send me a DM on Instagram at everwellcoaching so I can share resources or create a future episode just for you. Stay tuned for our next episode, and until then, remember to take a moment each day to do something that fills your cup, mama.